How Sales Leaders Can Conquer Their Fear with Wesleyne

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Hello, and welcome to the transform sales

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podcast today I have your guest Wesleyne. Yes, that's right. I

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am doing a solo episode for you why? Because this is going to be

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our ADF episode eight, zero. Can't believe how many episodes

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we've done a podcast is definitely a labor of love. So

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what are we going to be talking about today on the podcast, I'm

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going to be talking about fear, something that we don't often

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talk about something that isn't something that we as sales

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leaders, as business owners, or even salespeople like to really

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touch, because it's this weird thing that we often find

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ourselves running away from. So we'll be talking about three

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different types of fear. The first type of fear is one that

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we're probably pretty common to understanding, if you will, that

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is the fear of rejection. So as a salesperson, when we think

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about rejection, we're thinking about, really, okay, if I asked

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this person for this purchase order, what's gonna happen?

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They're gonna say, no, if I asked him for another meeting,

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if I asked them to meet their boss, whatever, I asked them,

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they're gonna say no. So what do we do? We just don't do? Because

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we're so scared of being rejected that our answer is I'm

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just not going to do it. How does that manifest? How does

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that develop into a leadership fear of failure? What happens

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is, as a leader, we typically have these really high

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performing people on our teams. And we see that they're doing

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probably 60 70% of their job, right. But there are other areas

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in their job, and maybe in their personality and the things that

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they're doing from day to day, that they just aren't doing the

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right way. And we're scared of them biting our head off, we're

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scared of them saying, You don't know anything, you haven't been

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doing this long enough. You're a leader now, and all of those

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negativities that come to us. So because we want to be sort of

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liked by our employees, we decide that we won't say

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anything. And then when it comes time to stand up for ourselves

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with our managers, we won't say anything, either, because we're

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scared of being rejected. Like they gave me this position. They

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said, Hey, John, Hey, Sally, hey, Wesleyne, I'm gonna promote

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you. And since I'm giving you this opportunity to become a

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sales leader, a vice president of sales, a chief sales officer,

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then I shouldn't have any problems, right? So I'm scared.

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So that is the first type of fear that we often often really

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have that's holding us back the fear of rejection. Now the fear

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of failure. This is a big one, too. Because as these strong

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sales leaders, sales people that we are, we are always scared of

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failing, we think that if we fail, then nobody will give us a

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second chance. We think that if we hit miss our quota, one

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quarter, one month, one year, then we have to run for the

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hills, and look for a new position. Because we are scared

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to fail as strong driving leaders and sales people we are

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used to winning. So when the thought of failing, pops into

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our brain, we get really mousy. And what do we do when we're

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scared of failing? We do the opposite of what we should do.

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We become more conservative, we don't try new things. And that

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hinders us as leaders, because the worst thing you can do as a

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leader is follow the status quo. Yes, I'm saying the worst thing

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you can do as a leader is follow the status quo. Nobody wants a

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leader that follows the status quo, because that's boring, and

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you'll never grow that way. So because you're so scared of

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failing, you don't even try. You don't even start you don't even

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move. Now. This last phenomenon in failure is the fear of

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success. But hold up Wessling, you just told me that I fear

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rejection, I fear failure and now I fear success. How can I be

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afraid of success? Hmm, that's a good one. Being afraid of

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success. It really goes into it brings both concepts of fear of

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rejection and the fear of failure together because the

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fact that you are scared of being successful is the reason

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why you won't raise your hand is the reason why you won't try

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something completely outside of the box. It's why instead of

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you're looking and you're saying hey, it's time for me to move In

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my career, I'm just going to stay in my same industry, I'm

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not going to look outside for any other industry, because what

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happens if you're not successful? What is the

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alternative? So many times we think about the growth that we

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have to have in our career, we're always trying to get to

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the next level and the next level and the next level, and we

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get knocked down one time. And then we're like, Well, maybe

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it's not meant for me to be a vice president of sales, maybe

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it's not meant for me to work in this manufacturing industry,

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maybe I should go back in I should work in the factory,

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right? So we take all of those things, and it prevents us from

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even being successful. So I want you to take a moment and think

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about which of these three phenomenons Do you really think

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you are struggling with the most? Is it the fear of

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rejection, so really focusing on what other people think of you

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their perception of what success looks like to them? That is what

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the fear of rejection is all about? It's so focused on other

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people's opinions of you that you don't even try? Is it the

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fear of failing? Because at one time in your career, or one time

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in your life, you have considered yourself failing at

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something? And so you're like, Well, if I fail again, I'm gonna

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get the same result. I don't want to fail again. So that fear

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of failure that is internal, that is something in the past

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that is causing you to bring that negativity into the future

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and causing you to not try again? Or is it the fear of

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success? Well, if I started making more money than all the

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people in my circle, they'll think that I'm bougie. Or

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they'll think that we can't hang out anymore. So I'm not even

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going to try to go for that promotion. I'm not even gonna

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try to do that. Because what happens if I am successful, all

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types of fear hold you back as a leader, as a leader, when we

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operate with that fear mindset, the mindset of scarcity, the

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mindset of I'm afraid, that resonates down to our team. So

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they see you as a leader, not raising your hand for the

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promotion, or not accepting the praise and accolades from doing

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something so well until your salespeople embody that. That is

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what happens when you hold on to this fear. So how do I begin

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releasing this fear? How do I go from holding on to one, two, or

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all three of these types of failure and really start moving

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through it, the first step is you must realize that you are

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holding on to this, you must realize that as a human being,

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it is okay to be afraid. If you see a snake slithering into your

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office, or you see a cockroach, and you're just innately scared

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of it. It is okay to be scared. Fear is a natural human emotion.

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However, it is not okay to let that fear cripple you, you must

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identify your fear. So some people are afraid of heights.

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They say I'm afraid of heights. And so what do they do, they

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just don't jump out of an airplane, or they don't go

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anywhere high. But that's not attacking your fear head on.

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Whatever you are afraid of, you must first identify it. So you

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say it into the world. You write it down, you do whatever. And

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this is for you. This is not for anyone else. But you. So you say

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this is what I'm afraid of. This is what my biggest fear in my

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career, and my personal life that is holding me back, write

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it down. Once you have identified that fear, you must

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now take a moment and say, Is this something that I can

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conquer on my own? Or do I need someone to help me tease this

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out that someone can be a spouse, that someone can be a

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coach that someone can be a therapist, but be honest with

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yourself? Because when we're in these modes of failure,

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especially as leaders, we're in our head. And when I say we're

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in our head, that's I'm just swirling around, and I'm telling

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myself that this is wrong. And this is right, and we're not

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talking to anyone else. We're not speaking to anyone, we're

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just rolling these thoughts around in our head. So write it

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down. Realize that you need support it is okay to say I need

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some help. And it can be professional or it can be

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someone in your family a loved one. That is absolutely okay.

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And then finally, after you've discussed this fear with someone

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you realize what it is you must now start taking small steps to

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attack this fear head on.

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What are you talking about? How do I attack fear head on? Isn't

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this just like an abstract Concept know, if you have a fear

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of success, let's say you are scared of being successful. So

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that means what you should do is you should go to your boss and

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say, Hey, boss, last week, the team and I did this great

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initiative, I just wanted to let you know, how we work together,

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how I came up with this idea, whatever it was the part that

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you played in it, and wanted to share that with you. That is one

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small step that you can take to really help you overcome that

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fear of success. Because being afraid of success means that you

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will not you will not self promote yourself. And remember,

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self promotion is not a bad thing. self promotion is good.

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We all have to promote ourselves, because nobody else

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will, if you don't raise your hand and say, Hey, this is my

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name, this is what I've done. I'm ready for the next step, or

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the next accolade. Or it could even be I just want to be

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recognized for a job well done, you must start raising your

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hand. That's how you start attacking the fear of success

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head on the fear of rejection, you just have to do it. Right?

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You just have to really think about all of the areas in your

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professional career that you fear rejection, is it I fear

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being rejected by a person on my team, so I'm not going to

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address a negative behavior with them. Then you have a

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conversation, you have a one on one with them. And you say, Hey,

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I've noticed that you're displaying some of these

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behaviors, you're doing a lot of wonderful things. However, this

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is something that I want us to work on together us a unit,

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right? And if they say I don't want to work on that with you,

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as the leader, you get to decide, is this somebody that I

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still want on my team? That's what you have to do? Proclaim

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it? What is the thing that is holding you back? What kind of

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fear is holding you back? Talk about it, get your support

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system, no one exists as an island, and then three, attack

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it head on. So that guys was my short, only 15 minutes. I know

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you're old, you still longer episodes when I'm interviewing

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people. But I really wanted to chat with you about the fear,

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fear that is holding us back in our leadership fear that is

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holding us back as salespeople as business owners and

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entrepreneurs to really unlock your growth to unlock the next

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level in your career in your business and anything that

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you're doing. You must overcome this fear in all the ways that

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is holding you back. Thank you so much for joining me today. I

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hope you enjoyed this episode. And if you like hearing Wesleyne

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by herself, just go off on a topic send me an email, shoot us

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a note podcast at transform sales.com We love to hear from

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you guys. So if you liked this format, I'll do more solo

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episodes. Until next time in all that you do transform your sales